Just Call Me Mandi Lou Who

Like the Grinch, my heart grew two sizes this weekend. And while in comparison, my own heart started out larger by far than that of the Green miser who stole Christmas from Who-Ville, I know that if someone were to measure my heart like they did his, it would clearly show a huge difference had been made! I even have the chest pain to prove it! (Or perhaps that's only the remnants of a few days of rich food and cocktails?)

Either way, Jeremy and I hosted our first holiday get-together at our home yesterday. It was the first annual Coleman/White Christmas, and both sets of family were present. It really turned out to be a great time; everyone brought brunch items and we ate our Who Pudding and carved our Roast Beast. The parents exchanged presents, and we all got to catch up while sitting around the glow and glitter of the Christmas tree. It turned out to be a growing experience for the two of us, also. We had to be adults together, cleaning and cooking in preparation for our home to be open to others. It was great practice for the future, when we will hopefully have a larger house that could host larger family gatherings!

While Christmas music played in the background, we all realized that it was a momentous occassion and celebrated accordingly! Of course the festivities couldn't stop there. Tonight will be a ruinion with Jeremy's brother and sister in law, while each following night has a different event, all focusing on that one theme - family.

The Amanda/Alice Project?

Tonight Jeremy and I skipped out on the multitude of activities we had planned, and instead spent the evening eating take-out and Tim Tams while watching Julie and Julia. Both were inspiring enough to write about. The movie was what I had hoped it to be; while the few bad reviews, (and a husband who had other things he would rather go to the movies for), kept me from viewing in the theater this past fall, we rented it within a week of its coming to Blockbuster. Both of us laughed while indulging in a variety of dishes spread out on the cocktail table in front of us. There could be no other way of watching a movie dedicated to the obsession of food.

The movie inspired me in ways other than the consumption of calorie-laden food, however. "I could write a blog; I have thoughts." That is exactly what Julie Powell said as she spoke to her husband regarding her place in the world, or rather, attempting to find that place. Just another Alice wandering through Wonderland, in search of her niche, if you would. I related on that, and many other levels. Now I sit back and wonder, do my thoughts and ponderings warrant enough material to put pen to paper (or to be more current, fingers to keys), on a daily basis? Maybe we'll all find out. At the very least, I will.

The Nightmare Before Christmas

With a firm belief in God's perfect plan, and realizing that my actions can allow me to deviate from the path he wants me to go down, one occurance in today's events brought on the migraine that is now slowly forming in the back of my skull.

For me to realize that if I had just had my cell phone number changed hours previously, instead of waiting until the end of the workday as procrastination would have it, I could have avoided an onslaught of text messages of a stalker-ish nature. They came from the ghost of nightmare's past, and asked a barrage of questions regarding my wherabouts, along with the hint of reconnecting. As Dicken's himself will let you know, no one wants more than one encounter with a ghost. Let's just say, even a grim reaper, ghost of Christmas Yet to Come would quake at the sight of the one that beckoned me.

Had I been proactive in this one tiny area of my life, my evening would have been pain free, and my new shiny phone may not have suffered the mental abuse I put it through as I threw curses and insults its way.

Crafting Some Time to Create

After spending the weekend putting up decorations throughout the entire house, I find myself still in the mood to decorate, paint, write...well just create something of any kind really. After having to expand my mind and decorate on somewhat of a budget, it has left that portion of my head gaping wide open and in need of an outlet to put it to good use. And while the list of pursuits I would like to undertake is still growing, the time to do even one of these is another issue altogether.

These days I find my bum is securely fastened to a chair 40 hours a week, leaving less time to craft something of my own. But then take into account the mental exhaustion that I feel most days from looking at a computer screen, and that time diminishes even more drastically. My solution for now? Gazing at the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree as I lay wrapped in a quilt, getting up only to create some hot cocoa, a gratification of the highest level when homemade!

It's a Wonderland Life

Even though the classic Jimmy Stewart movie comes to mind when thinking of this title, I have to take into account the many twists and turns life has taken since my last post. The holidays will now be celebrated in a new home, with my husband of almost three months. This time last year I was meerly following the candy filled path God was laying out for me, picking up each little treat as I came to them. I had no idea that by not deviating too much it would bring me to this chapter in the wonderland novel that has become my life.

Thanksgiving is tomorrow and I will be setting foot into a new home, crossing the threshold and beginning traditions that are commonplace for most of the attendees there, but are exciting, and a little intimidating, for me. From it Jeremy and I will be able to take two different family's way of doing things and form our own rituals for the future. When I sit back and take it all in this way, it begins to be something awe-inspiring. The stuff of novels; while words begin to form pages and chapters, then are bound and enjoyed by others, so will our choices these first few years form holidays that others will celebrate with us.

Currently its our winter wonderland we're focusing on, and I can say by the soaring tree and sparkling wreaths that we're creating something more than magic; we're making a tiny world of our own.

Time Flies...

Noticing that it has been almost one month since I last shared the experiences, viewpoints, and questions pertaining to my life right now, I wanted to take the time and give a more detailed account of the goings-on since that time. There comes a point when so much activity and change has taken place that instead of updating everyone on the wonderful occurrences, I shut down and decide that it might be too much effort, too much information shared in one sitting to really delve in and give a testimony of it all.

Let's just say that no two days are alike - no afternoon knows that the night will bring. Every situation is so unique that I could in no way describe a three week time period with any understanding to the listener...or reader in this case. I have come closer to God through my own encounters, and my relationships with the people I've come to know and love, than I could have ever imagined. God has really given me giftings in areas that at one point seemed intimidating to me, now having me ask for even more experiences with Him and His greatness.

One day perhaps I'll write a full account. I know when time slows back down to a normal pace I will want to recount the activities in my mind and most likely be burning to put pen to paper and get those thoughts out before they threaten to take over and consume all present day interactions.

A Call to More than Greatness

How can I describe the life changes that have taken place since the last time I put pen to paper? Terms that would typically describe alterations in life’s journey just can’t apply. Freedom has been overused, as has “set free”. All of the Christian terms that people use without abandon will not be used by me this day. To use them would be to make what God has done in my life one big understatement. Therefore, I’ll do my best to paint a picture for you in another way.

My father, my savior, my hero, my friend, my lover – he has taken me captive by bringing me to this place in my life. He has spoon fed me back to health. Last week brought about revelations from my childhood that transformed me from a lowly street urchin into a saint. This week, a team from Tacoma, Washington came to speak God’s original design for each of us into our lives. Through many prayer times, God showed me such surprising, frightening, intense and wonderful things about his thoughts on my creation that I cannot even begin to tell you for fear of not being believed. I would rather slowly reveal these multiple destinies for my life into the world.

One vision I will describe now, however. It is of a flower, seemingly frail and small. - picture a tulip if you will. Now place it in a deep ocean of snow. Against all odds, this flower blooms underneath the icy conditions and pushes it’s way to the top for fresh air and a chance at true existence. Nothing was able to stop this tulip from attaining its goal of a full life. This is what God has shown me that I am to him. He has made me small, yet resilient. And because of this, He has fashioned me to love the unloved. To heal them and make them whole; to speak truth of the future into their lives. He showed me that I would soon be a bomb of change that is detonated wherever He sets my feet. The call my father has placed on my life is daunting and exhilarating – and I’m up for the challenge.

My Fleshly Eulogy

Mandi Coleman, vain materialist involved with many worldly vices, died recently after a fierce spiritual battle of flesh. Mandi was an active member of Nashville's young social set, contributing nightly to the worldly indulges of glitz and glam. Superficial and always hungry for more and better, society will miss her fashion prophesies and shallow commentaries on Southern vogue. Both genders will never forget her presence in hot spots about town as she self-righteously made herself known after mastering the art of sorrowful disguise in self disgust. 

She is survived by Amanda Brooke, her contemporary. She leaves her physical body and nothing more. Amanda, having become an heir to the King, has no need of any of the former and has sold Mandi's belongings to charity.

Wishin' and Hopin' and Thinkin' and Prayin'

And waiting...

Yes, waiting is how I've been spending the majority of my time this last week. But as Dionne Warwick pointed out, you won't get Him thinkin' and a-hopin'. I have to show Him that I care just for Him. I need to do the things He likes to do and love Him. Wearing my hair just for Him probably wouldn't hurt my odds, either. But hours worth of hoping He's going to speak to me isn't going to be very effective if I want something to actually take place - besides me falling asleep with that same longing. Showing him I care by reading His word, praising Him and singing my heart out for Him, not caring how others perceive me,  and diligently waiting on Him to come around are the key ways He's going to show up.

Of course, I still have to put all this into practice or I will still be sitting here wondering how long I'm going to wrestle with the Angel of God before He blesses me. I'm sure in the weeks to come I'll look back on this entry and laugh at the ways He's made himself known since then. As for now though, I'm anticipating that.

Still, Small Voices

My Discipleship Training School has officially been in session for 3 days, and within that amazingly small frame of time God has been showing up in the largest possible way. Although our small group of people have only known each other for less than five days, we immediately had the strangest sensation of being long time friends. Not just that, but every staff member has commented on the fast progression of our group's worship and communication style with one another. Testimony day was revealing and emotional, and we've all been brought to deeper levels of understanding with the other.

On a personal level, God has really been speaking to my heart regarding my past. Just today He spoke through someone else regarding Isaiah 54. Read it - it will blow your mind. Or...at least it did for me! Ultimately it says that even though I was forsaken as a young married woman, God raised me up and fashioned me into a weapon for his use through those experiences. Interestingly enough, yesterday it was revealed to me that Mandi actually means Warrior Maiden.

So many stories such as these have happened only within the last 24 hours. He's spoken through other people regarding my future husband, and has revealed to me the qualities that man will possess. I cannot wait to spend my life with this person, but at the same time am in such a wonderful growing and learning period with the Lord that I know He's making me into the woman of God that this man will need so that we can be in ministry together - Like Priscilla and Aquila of the bible.

Rocky Mountain High

I arrived in Colorado late Wednesday night and since then have been doing nothing but sightseeing. It's been great, but I can't help but wonder what happened to the frigid temperatures I was told to prepare for. Not that I'm complaining; I can't stand for the temps to even dip below the 70 degree mark, let alone be so cold you need snow chains to pull you and your vehicle down the road. Luckily I think God is slowly getting me used to the weather, so we've had two beautiful days!

I'm so excited and nervous to be traveling to Colorado Springs on Saturday. My brother made the very long drive to Denver with me from Nashville, but he'll be staying at our friends while I move to my new home with YWAM. Excited because of what I know God is getting me ready to learn, see and do. Nervous because I'll be surrounded by many people I've never met, and a few I only know slightly. Never one to willingly give up my comfortable, familiar set of friends, I'm definitely stepping out of my comfort zone. But as I realize, and everyone keeps confirming, this group of people I'll be spending each day with for at least the next six months is exactly who God has chosen for His work. That's amazing when you stop to think about it. He spoke to each of us individually for this common goal that we aren't even aware of yet. We will each be bringing something to the mix that is unique and yet similar to accomplish whatever the end goal is going to be! Needless to say, that tips the scale heavily in excited's favor!